It's been one heck of year for me. My life has done this 180, that I wasn't prepared for. I've had to experience things, I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. And...I've also been blessed. Blessed by friends, here on Cyclefish, and here, where I live. Unfortunately, one side effect of this past year, is that I find myself, in a funk, most of the time. Depression. I know that's what it is, cause I have all the lovely "clinical" symptomology. No joy, in just about anything. (And I live in a BEAUTIFUL home, with a gorgeous yard, and view). Crying. For no apparent reason, other than I can. (oh...but I have reason). Extreme moodiness. Mostly, I find myself, pissed off at the world. And I bark at the two people I should be loving the most. I go to church. I go to bible study, I go and help the homeless. But I feel like I'm "going" thru the motions. And I pray, incessantly. But, alas, that too, doesn't "feel" the same lately.
I am going to Saluda, North Carolina, this coming weekend. On a four day spiritual retreat. And the only "expectation" I have, is to enjoy some quiet time, in a beautiful place, with some beautiful people. To be closer to God, and feel HIS presense.
Would I like it to be the place, where all of my past problems, and their "fall-out", finally find peace and resolution? Sure. But, if I want God to show up, in a BIG way, I have to go without agenda. I have to go without expectation, I have to go with an open mind, and an open heart. And...I have to go, because I feel I'm being "lead". That, that's where HE wants me to be.
So, I'm going. I will keep all of you, in my thoughts and prayers, and I only ask, that you do the same, for me.
I LOVE YOU ALL!
Ride Free
TWEEK
March 12, 2012- -
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Have a most enjoyable weekend !!! : )
March 12, 2012- -
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March 12, 2012- -
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March 14, 2012- -
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