December 8, 2011 11:26 PM PST
. ...A guy is browsing a pet shop, and sees a parrot sitting on a perch.
it dosent have any feet or legs.
The says aloud...Geesh...I wonder what happened to this parrot ?
The parrot says. ...I was born this way.
Im a defective parrot.
...Holy Crap ! ....the guy replies.
...You actually understood and answered me !
I got every word...says the parrot.
..I happen to be a highly intelligent, and throughly educated bird.
...Oh yeah ?....the guy asks.
Then answer this...how do you hang on your perch with out any feet ?
...Well, the parrot says...this is very embarrassing...but since you asked...I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a llittle hook.
...You cant see it because of my feathers.
...Wow...says the guy.
. ..You really can understand and speak english...cant you ?
...Actually...I speak both Spanish and english....and I can converse with people with reasonable competence on almost any topic...political...religion...sports...physics...and philosophy.
..Im especially good at orinthology.
...You really ought to buy me...Id be a good companion.
The guy looks at the 200 dollar price tag.
. ..Sorry....but I just cant afford that.
. ...Psssssttt. ...says the parrot. ..Im defective, so the truth is...nobody wants me, cause I dont have any feet.
. ..you can probably get me for 20 bucks. ...just make the guy an offer !
The guy offers 20 bucks...and walks out the door with the parrot.
Weeks go by.
The parrot is sensational.
He has a great sense of humor...hes interesting...hes a great pal...he understands everything...he sympathizes...and hes insightful.
The guy is delighted.
One day he comes home from work and the parrot goes...Psssssssssst. ...and motions him over with one wing.
. ..I dont know if I should tell you this or not...but its about your wife and the UPS guy.
...What are you talking about, ask the guy ?
...When the UPS man delivered the package today...your wife greeted him at the door....in a sheer black nightie.
...WHAT ?!?!? ....the guy asks incredulousy .
. ...THEN...what happened ??
...Well...then the UPS man came into the house.....and lifted up her nightie.....and began petting her all over...reported the parrot.
...NO ! ..the man exclaims...and she let him ??
. ....Yes
. ..Then he continued taking off her nightie....got down on his knees.....and began to kiss her all over.
The frantic guy demands. . ....THEN WHAT HAPPENED ?!?!?!?
. . . ....Dunno, says the parrot. ...I got a hard on. ...and fell off my perch.
. . . . . . .. . ..........................
